DO YOU TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR LIFE?
I have realised, recently, just how often I hear people say things like “I can’t believe how unreasonable they have been, how was I supposed to know…….?” or “I know you are supposed to do…… but who really does that?” and other versions of these statements.
What it has made me do is really look at my own life and assess just how much I try to give away responsibility for what happens around me. I find that when I am talking to people who have this type of “not my fault” attitude I find it really frustrating so I have been exploring why I choose to react this way and the result wasn’t a very pleasant one.
As I looked back over my adult life I realised that I have tended to play the “Blame Game” on others instead of standing up and taking responsibility for myself and my outcomes. I found that in many facets of my life, up until a few years ago, I absolutely blamed other people around me for my actions and what happened in my life. This occurred in a couple of different areas that I will give examples of for you to understand what I mean.
In my career prior to being a coach I worked as a Police Officer for 12 years than as a Corporate Executive for 8 years and in both of these I found I often blamed my bosses for being incompetent, harsh, judgmental etc. What I have realised more recently is that I was still responsible for what I was supposed to do and was “playing in their game” in effect which meant that it was their rules. I therefore had absolutely no right to question their methods or beliefs etc because, rightly or wrongly, they had been given the positions of authority that I decided to work under.
Similarly in my relationships, both romantic and otherwise, I would often blame the other person for not being who I wanted them to be and would justify to myself that it was their fault that it wasn’t working out or that they weren’t great relationships. It was again my choice to be in those relationships and therefore ultimately my responsibility to make the best decisions for me based on what I wanted, not what I wanted from the other person.
Now through the work we do I have realised how blaming everyone and everything else in my life for my situations is just a cop out. It is certainly the easy way out and used to allow me to feel sorry for myself and play the victim card instead of standing up and getting serious in my life.
In my life now I absolutely take full responsibility for what happens in my life and sometimes have to admit to myself that I haven’t operated as effectively as I could have. Overall this is a far more enjoyable way to live because I can’t blame anyone else for what happens and therefore I am also responsible for the great things that occur. We all make mistakes but the mark of a great person is one who will put up their hand and take responsibility for these mistakes.
Look around your own life and honestly ask yourself “Am I taking responsibility in my life?” If the answer in any area is NO then get off your butt and get out and change that. When you realise there are areas you can take more responsibility for it is a great thing because it means there is massive room for improvement.
Here are a few areas to ask yourself the question about.
- Relationships
- Career
- Money
- Health and Fitness
- Self Worth and Confidence.
When you realise you haven’t taken full responsibility, turn it around and create whatever you really would love to have.
Take responsibility for your life and you will see just how amazing it is and how amazing the possibilities are for you.
Have a great week.
Donna
Live It Up Coaching,
